Archive for October, 2009

The American Gladiators

Wednesday, October 28th, 2009

I could care less about that new American Gladiators show, the original American Gladiators are definitely up to 88 in the coolest way possible. I used to love this show when I was a kid, it was so bad ass with the jousting and the human cannonball. But I think my favorite event was the one where they had a big network of hanging rings and you had to monkeybar along and throw the other person off. Check it out

The American Gladiators were definitely part of that unknowing 80’s homo-eroticism with Nitro the “arrogant dickhead” and Malibu the “surfer dude” (top and bottom ;)).

Check out the intro

But the best is where Nitro ended up: confessing his steroids in his memoirs. It’s absolutely priceless, he talks about his shrinking penis and growing man-boobs: “Breast-chesticles is what they’re called on the street. Gynecomastia is the scientific name.” (From `Gladiator: A True Story of ‘Roids, Rage and Redemption`)

Pluto

Wednesday, October 28th, 2009

2006 was a sad year for astronomy: it was the year astronomers ruled that Pluto is not planet.

Putting Pluto ‘up to 88’ makes me want to cry, but Pluto is really no different from any celebrity. In the 60’s-80’s the space race put Pluto in limelight. It’s fame trickled off but it still had a nice B-list stint in the 90’s. Pluto was never as big as the Moon or Mars or the Sun, but it was right in there with Jupiter and Saturn in that second tier of cool planets, and an an untouchable lone-wolf.

And now that I think about it, the wackest planet is probably Neptune. Who the fuck cares Neptune? Your spot is weak next to Jupiter’s and Saturn completely pwns your rings. You’re not even good for jokes like your neighbor Uranus. You may be the farthest planet in our Solar System, but you are definitely no Pluto.

Check out astrophysicist Michael Brown argue with the great Neil DeGrasse Tyson on whether Pluto is a planet