Celebrities that have gotten up to 88

The “Dude You’re Getting a Dell” Guy

Monday, August 2nd, 2010

Remember the commercials with the kid who always said “Dude you’re getting a Dell”?

Ben Curtis was that lovable stoner from all the Dell commercials in the late 90′s / early 2000′s. It was no small task: Curtis had to be lovable enough to both appeal to kids and get your parents to buy you a “school computer” (that was really only going to be used for Napster and porn).

Unfortunately, the Dell Dude met his end in the worst way possible: he got fired for smoking pot. What bullshit right? I mean they obviously hired him because he was a pothead. They only fired him because he got caught.

What’s the Dell Dude up to now? He’s a bartender in NYC, Dude get me a drink.

Watch a Dell Dude commercial

Ricardo Montalban

Saturday, May 29th, 2010

Ricardo Montalban, AKA Ricardo Gonzalo Pedro Montalbán y Merino, AKA KHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAN was a Mexican-born actor with an amazing voice. Poor Ricardo died about a year ago, the cause of death: sheer awesomeness.

Ricardo’s stint as Mr. Roarke on Fantasy Island was before my time, but I loved him as the suave bad guy in The Naked Gun. Montalban also had a supporting role in Spy Kids 3-D, which I have to admit I saw (and liked). Ricardo agrees:

Ricardo Montalban in Spy Kids 3-D

But undoubtedly the best role Montalban ever played was Khan in Wrath of Khan (and Star Trek TOS). Khan was the product of genetic engineering in the 1990′s, who was frozen in suspended animation and lost in space. That is until Kirk woke him and his super-human crew from their slumber. Needless to say shit went down.

Montalban in The Wrath of Khan

Ricardo was an amazingly smooth and unique man. Now that he’s gone, will anyone else ever be able to fill his shoes? Maybe Gunther?

Dennis Rodman

Thursday, May 20th, 2010

Dennis Rodman: proof that ugly people can make it.

To be honest, I’m not sure how Dennis Rodman stayed so famous for so long. He got started by simply looking weird: crazy tattoos, facial piercings and hair colors really appealed to 90′s audiences. Rodman was also a pretty good basketball player, but even combining the two really should have only yielded 6 months or so of big time fame.

I think it had more to do with the fact that Dennis Rodman was also some kind of bizarre 90′s sex icon. He mostly appealed to girls who really wanted to piss off their parents.

This picture sort of blows my mind (but then again not really):

Dennis Rodman....UPSIDE DOWN

Ronnie James Dio

Monday, May 17th, 2010

Dio was an awesome metal band from the 80′s headed by frontman Ronnie James Dio. In case you whipper-snappers don’t remember, Dio invented the devil horns (or at least their use in the heavy metal scene).

Poor Ronnie died yesterday, and will be greatly missed.

While Holy Diver was Dio’s biggest hit, Rainbow in the Dark has always had a much bigger place in my heart. I think it’s because the video is so awesome: it features a stuffy guy in a suit following this girl all over some city. When he finally catches up with her, she’s totally rocking out with Dio and all the guys in his band. Sorry dude.

However perhaps the saddest part about Dio’s death is that the official video for Rainbow in the Dark has been pulled from Youtube. I really don’t think Dio would have wanted it that way.

WWRJDD?

Dio also had an amazing cameo on South Park, which has also been pulled from YouTube (ugh). At least you can still watch it in Spanish.

Tony Little

Thursday, April 29th, 2010

Tony Little was pretty intense. He invented the Gazelle, an elliptical-type workout machine, and then proceeded to make a ton of commercials and workout videos.

Another thing I’m sure you’ve noticed about Tony is his amazing sense of style. Does he look like he’s from Florida to you too? I’m not really sure what I’m basing that on.

Watch a Tony Little commercial

I knew Tony Little was “up to 88″ once he started making ironic commercials for Geico:

Watch Tony’s Geico commercial

Pee Wee Herman

Thursday, February 4th, 2010

First of all I’d like to say that Pee Wee Herman was and will forever be my homeboy. But there’s no denying that he has gone ‘up to 88′, and in a big way.

My favorite Pee Wee moments of all time were in Pee Wee’s Big Adventure. It really has everything: a quest for a stolen bicycle, Dottie looking super hot, and Large Marge (who still gives me nightmares…).

Watch the best scene in Pee Wee’s Big Adventure

A while ago I realized that Pee Wee’s Big Adventure was directed by Tim Burton. I guess it makes sense, I mean remember the big weird dinosaur:

Pee Wee with a Tim Burton dinosaur

Jeff Goldblum

Monday, February 1st, 2010

Remember Jeff Goldblum? Hint: he was the sarcastic 90′s guy with the square glasses in all the iMac commercials (and every record executive’s personal hero).

There was a widespread rumor that Goldblum was drunk during every one of his performances, which I think was probably only partly true (the other part was cocaine).

And for some reason I was certain that poor Jeff died. But I see from Jeff Goldblum’s wikipedia entry that I’m wrong and he’s indeed alive and kicking, and doing one of the 50 different Law & Orders. So I guess that means I can’t put him up to 88 just yet…

Well ‘two thumbs up’ on being alive, Jeff! Too bad I already made a memorial picture from when you looked hardcore in Jurassic Park:

RIP Jeff Goldblum

And in case you ever wonder whether Jeff Goldblum is alive, you can go to www.isjeffgoldblumalive.com

Janeane Garofalo

Sunday, January 31st, 2010

Oh Janeane Garofalo you were so important in the 90′s. Your angry thing really appealed to Gen-Xers until around 2000 when they all got too old to care.

Wikipedia says Generation X likes Janeane Garofalo because of Reality Bites. It makes sense to me. (When I first saw that movie I was too young to know they smoked a can bowl.)

In any case, do you want to know the truth about cats and dogs? Janeane Garofalo is up to 88 and won’t be coming back.